Living with Someone’s Negative Energy: How to Protect Your Own Space
Protecting Your Energy: How to Manage Negative Influences in Your Life
Are you living with, working with, or constantly needing to interact with someone who continually carries negative energy?
If you answered "Yes," you probably dread it the moment they walk through the door, email or call you. This is something we've all dealt with. It might be an overworked, tired, and frustrated partner or spouse-feeling under-appreciated and lashing out. Or, perhaps it's a teenager who holds it together all day but falls apart when they come home, overwhelmed by big emotions. Maybe it's aging parents who are fearful because they are isolated and spend too much time watching negativity on the news-and you're the only person they can turn to as an outlet.
Whatever the situation, you're not alone. I hear about clients living with negative energy from others every single week. When we live or work with someone negative, it can change our mood in an instant. Establishing strong energy boundaries is essential; without them, we can easily absorb negativity and mirror others' emotions. By consciously maintaining these boundaries, we protect ourselves from being influenced by their feelings.
💭 Do you feel like this?
– Dread when they walk in the room
– Constant tension in your body that isn’t yours
– Emotional exhaustion after every conversation
– Resentment for someone you love but can’t help
– Trying to “fix it” just so you don’t have to feel it anymore
In my 30 years as an intuitive energy healer and spiritual coach, this is one of the most common challenges I help clients navigate. I've worked with hundreds of people, from healthcare workers absorbing patient trauma to parents managing teenagers' emotional storms to professionals dealing with toxic workplace dynamics. Through my own experiences as highly sensitive person, and thousands of client sessions, I've learned that protecting your energy isn't selfish-it's essential. And it's absolutely learnable. Learn more about my approach and services [here]
You can find numerous testimonials from people who have done this work with me on my Instagram [here]. People see results immediately when they do my energy boundaries session and start using these tools daily. They literally say their lives are changed.
✨ Before we go further, here’s a simple technique I teach every client, because it works.
[Download the Rose Meditation ➝]
Understanding the Effects of Negative Energy
When you live or work closely with someone who is carrying negative energy, it can feel like you’re constantly on edge. You are resisting when this person may come in the door or calls you on the phone.. They don’t even have to say anything, just their presence can affect you. Much like animals in a herd who instinctively pick up on a sense of danger or panic and act accordingly, we too absorb the emotions of those around us. If someone is fearful, stressed, or anxious, we might begin to feel the same way without even realizing why. Think about a negative coworker who constantly fears they might lose their job, soon, the whole office is worried. Or someone in a tense environment begins to hold their breath and tense their shoulders; it won't take long before the people around them do the same.
Without energy boundaries, it becomes almost impossible to protect yourself from other people’s emotions or maintain healthy relationships. We might start resenting the person, wishing they weren’t around, or feeling angry every time they enter the room. This is something that comes up every week in sessions with my clients. We’ve all got that person.
✨ You can love someone… without absorbing their emotions.
Why Negative Energy Affects Us So Deeply
The Science Behind Emotional Contagion
Have you ever wondered why you can walk into a room and immediately sense tension, even when no one has said a word? Or why being around someone who's anxious makes your own shoulders tighten up? There's actual science behind this phenomenon.
Mirror Neurons: Your Brain's Emotional Copycat Our brains contain specialized cells called mirror neurons that automatically mimic what we observe in others. When you see someone frown, your mirror neurons fire as if you're frowning too. This neurological response happens in milliseconds, faster than conscious thought. It's why watching someone in pain makes you wince, or why yawning is contagious.
When you're around someone carrying heavy emotions, your mirror neurons are constantly firing in response to their facial expressions, body language, and energy. Your nervous system begins to mirror their state without your permission.
Your Nervous System's Survival Response From an evolutionary perspective, this emotional mirroring kept our ancestors alive. If one person in the tribe sensed danger, everyone needed to feel that urgency immediately. Your nervous system still operates this way, it picks up on stress, fear, and negativity as potential threats.
When someone around you is chronically stressed or negative, your nervous system stays in a heightened state of alert. This is why you might feel:
Tension in your shoulders and jaw
Difficulty sleeping after difficult conversations
Unexplained anxiety when they're around
Physical exhaustion from "just talking"
The Energetic Field Connection Beyond the neurological response, many energy workers and intuitive practitioners recognize that we all have an energetic field, sometimes called an aura, that extends beyond our physical body. When someone's energy field is disrupted by fear, anger, or chronic stress, it can create ripples that affect the energy fields of people around them.
Think of it like being in a pool when someone creates waves. Even if you're not moving, the water around you is affected. Similarly, turbulent emotional energy doesn't stay contained, it ripples outward.
Why Some People Affect Us More Than Others You might notice that certain people's energy affects you more intensely. This often happens when:
You have a close emotional bond (family, romantic partners)
You're naturally empathic or highly sensitive
You share living or working space with them
You're going through your own period of stress or transition
They trigger a soul or core memory for you
The Compound Effect Here's what makes this particularly challenging: the longer you're exposed to negative energy without proper boundaries, the more your own nervous system becomes dysregulated. You might find yourself becoming more reactive, less patient, or feeling "not like yourself."
This isn't a character flaw, it's a natural human response to chronic stress exposure. Understanding this can help you feel less guilty about needing to protect your energy and more motivated to create healthy boundaries.
The Desire to Fix It
When we feel their discomfort, we naturally want to fix it. We try to make the negative person feel better because, let’s face it, we also want to feel better. If they feel better, we won’t have to carry or feel their negativity, right? We may care about them deeply, but the truth is, we cannot fix their emotions. They are the ones who need to work through their feelings and challenges. When we try to change or “fix” someone, we’re stepping out of our lane and into theirs. We start expending our own energy in ways that drain us while trying to solve a problem that isn’t ours to carry.
🚧 What happens when you try to fix someone else’s pain
This "fixing" can also backfire, often, the person lashes out even more because they already have too much of other people's energy and expectations swirling around them.
What transpires? You end up with one person stuck in a negative space and another person feeling overwhelmed by it. The result? It becomes a toxic dynamic, and nobody wins. So, how do we change this pattern?
The First Step: Realizing It's Not Your Problem to Fix
This might be one of the hardest lessons to learn: You cannot fix someone else’s energy. You might feel empathy for their situation or deeply care about them, but when you enter their emotional space, you may lose touch with your own feelings.
🛑 It’s not your job to carry their energy.
The first step in protecting your energy is understanding that their struggles are theirs to solve, not yours.
Ask yourself: Is this my lane? If the answer is no, then it’s time to release that energy and focus on what you can control, your own space and emotions.
🔒 Tools to Protect Your Energy (and Reclaim Your Peace)
Creating boundaries is essential for protecting your energy. By setting clear limits, you can preserve your emotional and mental well-being. The next step is setting a boundary around your energy. Imagine that your personal space, your aura, and your energy body have an invisible boundary. The moment someone negative enters your space, you need to have a boundary that doesn't let their energy in. It is vital to have this boundary already set before they come into the room. So this is something you want to do daily.
⭐ Ready to reclaim your energy?
Start with the Rose Meditation [here] to experience immediate relief. For ongoing support, join our monthly group meditation via Zoom - it's free when you sign up for the newsletter [here].
When you're ready for personalized guidance, join my Energetic Boundaries session 1-1 by phone, to learn simple, powerful techniques to clear away unwanted vibes, strengthen your personal field, and keep your space protected, every single day. Learn more & reserve your spot here ➝ [here]
Warning Signs You're Absorbing Someone Else's Energy
Your body and emotions will tell you when your boundaries need attention. Watch for these signals:
Physical Signs:
Sudden headaches or tension when they enter the room
Feeling drained after conversations, even short ones
Your shoulders, jaw, or stomach tightening around them
Difficulty sleeping after difficult interactions
Feeling "heavy" or sluggish in their presence
Overeating or drinking more than usual to numb the discomfort
Changes in appetite or sleep patterns
Feeling physically ill or run down more often
Emotional Signs:
Taking on their worry as if it's your own
Feeling anxious or angry without knowing why
Your mood shifting dramatically when they're upset
Feeling responsible for their emotional state
Losing touch with your own feelings and needs
Energetic Signs:
Feeling "not like yourself" around them
Your usual coping strategies stop working
Craving more alone time than usual
Feeling scattered or unfocused after interactions
The moment you notice these signs, it's time to strengthen your boundaries and clear your energy.
Emergency Energy Reset (When You Need Immediate Relief)
When you realize you've absorbed someone's negative energy, try these quick techniques:
The 30-Second Reset:
Excuse yourself to the bathroom or step outside
Take 5 deep breaths, imagining you're breathing out gray smoke (their energy)
On each inhale, breathe in golden light (your energy returning)
Shake your hands and feet to physically release the energy
The Boundary Repair:
Visualize your rose boundary and notice if it looks wilted or broken
In your mind, give it fresh water and sunlight
Set a firm intention: "I release any energy that isn’t mine"
Imagine a protective gold bubble around yourself for the rest of the interaction
The Grounding Technique:
If possible, touch something natural (tree, grass, or even a houseplant)
Feel your feet on the ground and imagine roots growing from them into the earth
Send any heavy energy down through your roots to be neutralized
Draw up fresh, clean earth energy to fill the space
Use these the moment you realize you're carrying someone else's emotional load.
Here’s an effective tool to use at home:
Visualize a Rose at the Edge of Your Aura.
Imagine a rose about an arm’s length away from you. This rose sits at the edge of your energy field and represents your emotional boundaries. Set an intention that anything negative or foreign stays outside of this rose. It cannot enter your space, the negative energy gets absorbed into the rose and is sent down to the center of the Earth to be recycled, or it bounces back to where it came from. The key here is that the negativity does not penetrate your space.
This exercise may sound simple, but it’s incredibly powerful when practiced daily. It’s part of the Rose Meditation, and bestselling author Jackie Pflug says it changed her life!
Download the Rose Meditation [here] to access the full 10 minute guided practice and begin experiencing its transformative power.
Your Daily Energy Protection Routine (5 Minutes)
Start each day with this simple routine to maintain strong boundaries:
Morning (2 minutes):
Take 3 deep breaths and visualize your rose boundary
Set an intention: "This Rose will protect me"
Imagine a golden light filling your personal space
Throughout the Day:
Check in with your body every few hours: "Is this energy mine?"
If you feel heavy or tense after interactions, take 3 conscious breaths
Visualize releasing any energy that isn't yours on each exhale
Evening (3 minutes):
Place your hands on your heart and ask: "What energy did I pick up today?"
Imagine washing it away in a shower of gold light (actual showers help too)
Thank your boundary rose for protecting you
This routine becomes automatic within a week and creates a foundation of energetic self-care.
What Clients Say About Energy Boundaries Work
The transformation people experience when they learn to protect their energy is profound and immediate. Here's what clients share after working with me:
"I've incorporated the practices into my daily routine, which has significantly improved my emotional well-being and resilience. I move forward with a lighter heart."
"It helped me release emotional burdens that I didn't even realize I was carrying."
"I finally have peace of mind in my own home again."
"I feel like a different person with renewed and lighter energy."
"For the first time in years, I can be around my family without feeling drained."
"The tools work immediately - I noticed a difference after the first session."
People consistently tell me that learning energy boundaries doesn't just help with difficult relationships - it transforms how they move through the world. They sleep better, feel more like themselves, and have energy for what matters most.
Find many more heartfelt client testimonials about energy boundaries sessions on my Instagram [link to Instagram].
Dive Deeper Into Energy Work
Understanding Your Aura: Learn more about your energetic field and how to read its signals [What is an Aura]
Soul Readings: Discover deeper patterns in your relationships and energy dynamics [Learn More & Schedule]
Coming Soon to the Newsletter
I'm working on an upcoming blog about soul contracts in relationships - exploring why certain people come into our lives and the energetic agreements we make with them. This will shed light on why some relationships feel so challenging energetically and how to navigate them with more awareness.
Don't miss these insights - sign up for the newsletter [here] to get these articles delivered straight to your inbox, plus monthly guided meditations and intuitive tools.
Feeling Drained by Someone Else’s Energy?
When you’re constantly carrying other people’s emotions, it’s more than just exhausting, it disrupts your own energetic field. But you can reset your boundaries, reclaim your calm, and protect your vitality.
In my 1:1 Energetic Boundaries session (by phone), you’ll discover simple yet powerful techniques to:
Clear away energy that isn’t yours
Create a protective energetic shield.
Reclaim your natural joy, clarity, and vitality
Release what doesn’t belong to you-and make space for the energy you truly need.
Sign up now for your 1:1 Energetic Boundaries session [here]→
🔮 Need personalized support?
Living with someone’s negative energy can leave you feeling utterly depleted. you don’t have to face it alone. In a 1:1 Intuitive Reading, or Energy Healing Session, I’ll tune into the energetic dynamics weighing you down, help you understand what’s disrupting your peace, and and offer clear, grounded guidance to restore your clarity, strength, and sense of renewal.
These sessions are often described as deeply comforting, empowering, and full of hope. [Book Your Session →]
Find many heartfelt client testimonials about sessions with Janet on Instagram ➝[here]
🌵 Ready for a full energetic reset and new beginning?
Join me in the healing desert at Miraval, Dec 4–7, 2025 for the Manifesting Immersion Retreat, a 3-day experience to clear, realign, and reconnect with what’s next. This immersion changes lives.
[Explore the Retreat →]
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